Would be nice if all those creative minds would find an old bowling ball at the local thrift store to get that strong desire to drill something out of their systems . . .
http://www.ebay.com/itm/121177117694BIN for $32.99 plus $10.12 shipping.
Seller says "2. It has been 95% cleaned, but needs a detailed cleaning. 4. Antique telephone has been converted to a table lamp, the lamp works but the telephone part doesn't. 5. Phone is in overall very nice condition. Has maybe 7 or so specks of white paint on it, probably from when someone was painting their house. The dial still works. Phone slight signs of age and the paint isn't as shiney as it would have been when it was new."
CRPF Bumper sticker #1: "Drill a Bowling Ball, not a Phone!"